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image is nothing.
2002-08-29 ::: 1:53 a.m.
I had a good thought, and now i've lost it. The world is round, and it blows my mind.I'm listening to myself sing from a recording of my band.... and i hate it. I absolutely despise the sound of my own voice. I know I suck at that for sure, but i've found I have some sort of complex where I think everything I do, be it music, poetry, or stories, I think is the worst piece of garbage ever when I am finished with it. Someone could honestly tell me it's the VERY best thing they've ever read, but I wouldn't believe them. It's strange. I wish I could change it. But I don't know how. Not only that, I have a negative image of myself. I think I'm hideous. Well, not hideous..... but I'm nothing special. Maybe someday I'll see things a little differently, but who knows. WHO BLOODY KNOWS? Mirrors don't like them so much..... nope. actually, the thing i hate the most is side profile. DESPISE side profile. I don't know. Maybe it's because nothing I do seems to be good enough for my dad it carried over into how I see myself physically, mentally, and spiritually. "'you do it to yourself, you do, and that's why it really hurts."
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